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Man Shoots Off His Dick Whilst Taking Selfies With Gun…

This has gotta hurt. A man from St Louis (USA) has reportedly shot off his penis whilst taking selfies with a loaded gun.

Image: Sure News

Image: Sure News

Once he was admitted to hospital, the man was told that he is in a stable condition. However, it is likely that he will never be able to reproduce. In a statement, the local police said:

“We’ve never had someone shoot off their own junk before. There was a man who shot off his foot, a middle-schooler shot her guinea pig, and even a baby was able to shoot both his parents, but never someone’s own junk.”

I absolutely hate the thought of shooting off my own dick. He must’ve been in massive pain. Like seriously, I have no words for this. Anyway, he said:

“First I posed with this badass look on my face. Then I thought the only thing girls like more than guns is men without shirts on.”

To stand out from the rest of the shirtless gun-selfies, I decided to take my pants off. I was trying to thrust my hips around and do the helicopter like my penis is another gun, but then the gun shot off instead of the camera.”

Image: medicine.missouri.edu

Image: medicine.missouri.edu

On a serious note, guns are dangerous. Please don’t play with them in front of the mirror- especially whilst naked.

 

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